danger is my middle name

This morning I ran 7.4 km along the sea wall finishing up the 26 km for Scotty and starting the 50 km for Leanna. People may think running along the sea wall is simple, pleasant, and relaxing. This is not true. Behold some of the obstacles and challenges I must face on a regular basis.

First of all, there are “rules.” I have never been particularly good with rules.

I do not obey this rule.

But I do obey this rule.

Then there are the obstacles. Some of them have warning signs to alert the runner when trouble is brewing. Unfortunately the meaning is not always super clear and I need to use my keen powers of deduction to recognise the nature of the dangers lurking beyond the next corner.

“Kung Fu master ahead”

“Reluctant wielder of ray gun is near”

“Tow trucks will be dropping cars in your way soon”

Not all dangers are marked. Some require observation powers set to maximum. For instance the casual walker, out for a morning stroll, might not realize that preparations have been made for enormous boats to come smashing into false creek and drop anchor.

Note the evenly spaced mooring points.

And how about this precariously balanced bridge! Note the barnacles have managed to cling to the posts as it has swung left and right into the water.

Bridge or teeter-totter death trap?

Not too bad you say? This is just the start. How about a virtually impassable wall.

A small section of the buttress of doom.

Up and over the wall I go. Around the bend. Now what? It probably couldn’t get any worse, right? WRONG. How about a giant freaking bird. Enormous. I nearly crapped myself. This one totally should have had a warning sign. I am pretty sure the only beast not afraid of this bird is the honey badger. He don’t care.

I bet this bird eats anything or anyone, even zombies.

Finally, after much toil and some time spent in what I’m pretty sure was a dungeon, I began my escape from the sea wall and made my way home.

Light at the end of the tunnel.

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5 Responses to danger is my middle name

  1. Alice! says:

    WERD. Love this one :)

  2. tess says:

    Me too! Very funny.
    -t

  3. kaan says:

    It is meant to be serious.

  4. Kristina says:

    The giant bird is Vancouver’s PROTECTION against zombies, how do you not know this? No living being should ever be scared of it!

    Wait… you’re an undead aren’t you? I knew it!

  5. Sara says:

    This makes me smile and makes me want to go on a sea wall adventure :).

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