Johannes Gensfleisch zur Laden zum Gutenberg

When addressing challenging global issues such as climate change it seems important in our present culture to establish blame before trying to start any meaningful dialogue. I can help with this step.

It was the Germans. Specifically, Gutenberg. He is the root cause of the problem.

Because of Gutenberg, bajillions of trees are cut each year to make books and magazines – a trend he started with his biosphere-destroying movable type printing press. Thousands of trees per newspaper are consumed daily. Many of them end up on the sidewalk or at the bottom of a hamster cage. Some trees end up as truly worthless trash in publications such as “Women’s World” and “Men’s Health” making the planet far worse for all who live on it. Toilet paper makes a substantially more positive contribution than those rags. Ultimately, Gutenberg did all this to us.

Now that we have blamed Gutenberg, can we get on to the meaningful dialogue where we are constructive, open, and honest about solutions?

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2 Responses to Johannes Gensfleisch zur Laden zum Gutenberg

  1. klidston says:

    Hah! Love it.

    Cosmo is my favorite for horrible advice though. http://www.nerve.com/advice/ridiculous-tips/the-best-of-ridiculous-tips-for-a-miserable-sex-life-emcosmopolitan-em-edition

    Seriously who reads these and takes them seriously?

  2. Courtenay Doug says:

    “…root cause…” and “…bajillions of trees…”? Pretty sappy pun; leaves me cold. Sorry, but I couldn’t think of a way to work “apical meristem” into it.

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